If you feel anything, it’s psychosomatic…in your mind, and I can’t help but wonder if it’s a projection of your guilt and shame, none of which you need to hang onto any longer.” Tina’s voice sounded weary; she didn’t know how to coax Bette out her mood. Bette reached and gently stroked the graying hair at the temples on Tina’s head. “I put you through so much and Andy…” she began.
“Bette I’m fine. Andrew’s fine. You and I…we’re fine,” Tina said impatiently. “Now come on, please…I want my strong, confident, fearless woman back…the woman that would pick me up and carry me to the bedroom and ravage me, the woman that would surprise me with flowers and wine, the woman who would laugh and tease me about my accent and funny sayings…please Bette, I want you back…babe, please?” And Tina felt herself getting choked up out of frustration and worry.
“I’m just so afraid all the time, Tina. Afraid something will happen to you, to Andy, Kit…I mean this was just a splinter, a goddamn fucking splinter and look at what happened…something so small. I’m afraid I’ll overlook something, something small and then you or Andy…I can’t lose you, Tina,” Bette said crying.
Tina let out a deep sigh of exhaustion and frustration and then she stood up and pulled Bette up from the chair. “You aren’t going to lose me, Bette,” she said and turned to go back inside. “Come on, you can help me with the dishes.” She switched off the waterfall and went inside.
Bette looked at the ripples of the last of the waterfall’s current. She realized her self-loathing was driving something between her and Tina, and if she didn’t shake herself loose of her funk, she would lose the love of her life.
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But finally, slowly each day Bette did become stronger as she made a deliberate effort to forgive herself and let go of the guilt she carried. She continued to see Dan twice a week, started scheduling weekly massages, stayed away from all alcohol and ate everything Tina put in front of her, gaining back her health and strength.
After about four weeks, she was able once again to stand and lecture from behind the podium, for she had been too weakened before to do so. She now helped Tina in the kitchen and cleaned up after every meal. She made a concerted effort to wait on Tina when she could…to get her a refill on her drink, rub her shoulders, and prepare her bath. She went out of her way to pick up their dry cleaning, get groceries, anything she could do to show Tina, and herself, that she was on the mend…that she had overcome the fear and doubt that had hung around her.
And she was finally able to hold Tina and make love to her tenderly and lovingly without exhaustion.
“Babe, please…don’t stop, please!” Tina cried as she buckled and trembled under Bette’s body.
“Let it go, sweetheart, cum for me…all the way…” Bette whispered in her ear and then she began to suck on Tina’s neck as her fingers swirled and glided over Tina’s wetness.
Tina dug the nails of one hand into Bette’s ass, driving her into her, the other gripped Bette’s forearm feeling the muscles flex and release as Bette’s fingers brought her to climax.
Bette slowed as Tina shook and convulsed as the last of the orgasm rippled through her and then she entered her and held still feeling the rapid pulsing of Tina’s inner walls grip her long fingers.
Bette relaxed her body, her full weight pressing into Tina’s. “I could fall asleep just like this, right on top of you, my fingers in you, listening to your breathing and heartbeat,” Bette whispered.
“Mmmm…yes, babe,” Tina whimpered.
And, they did just that; two souls, one body at rest.
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For Halloween Andy was Obi-Wan Kenobi…for the third time. As he prepared to go trick-or-treating with Shane, he told Tina that it would be his last year because he was really more like Luke Skywalker and she his Yoda.
“Really, well, let’s hope my complexion never turns that green,” Tina laughed and she adjusted his light saber belt. “So if I’m Yoda, who’s Obi-Wan?” Tina asked playfully expecting an answer that she didn’t get.
He thought a moment. “Well, I thought maybe Tia was for a while, but she seems more like Anakin.”
Tina had now watched all the movies with Andy and his statement made her blood run cold. “In the first one, right, as a young boy? Not in the latter two when her turns bitter, right?”
Andy shook his head sadly. “No, more like near the end of Attack of Clones. She’s been so moody.”
“Well she doesn’t mean to be, Andrew,” Tina said tenderly, and she ruffled his crazy hair. “She’s made a lot of progress in the last weeks. You watch, by Thanksgiving she’ll be her old self again.”
Tina escorted him out to the living room where Shane and Molly, Shane’s new girlfriend, waited to take him trick-or-treating.