KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
"Come in," Bette yelled from the couch, too uncomfortable to try to get up.
"Hey Bette," Shane poked her head in first through the open door. "Thought you might like some company."
A weary but grateful smile appeared on the face of the very pregnant mocha beauty. "I would love some company," she said letting go of a deep sigh.
"Cool," Shane smiled walking through the doorway followed by Carmen, Alice, Dana, and Kit.
Chuckling Bette gave her friends a look of gratitude. "I see you brought the cavalry with you."
Shane shrugged her shoulders. "Well, I just thought...you know."
Her eyes tearing up, Bette whispered. "Yeah, I know."
The women quietly shuffled into the livingroom of the house that had been their second home for so many years now. Each one taking a position either right next to Bette, or on the coffee table in front of her. Each making sure they were close enough to be able to touch the woman who had always been the leader of their pack.
They gathered here, in the home that had held such love, such warmth so they could grieve together on the anniversary of Tina’s death.
It had been one year ago today that Tina had been killed by a drunk driver on her way home from work. One year ago that the light that had always shone bright from her eyes, illuminating Bette Porter’s life, had been extinguished, plunging her soul mate into complete and total darkness.
It happened on a Friday evening. The man who hit her had stopped off at his favorite bar for the special 2 for 1 happy hour drinks. An hour, and four gin and tonics later, he got into his car believing that he was sober enough to drive...and then proceeded to cruised through a red light without even slowing down. Afterward he had claimed that he looked down for just a moment to change the radio station, and didn’t even see the light. And, just like so many others who cause so much devastation through their carelessness, he came through the crash without a scratch. Tina however, died instantly when his Mercedes SUV plowed directly into her driver’s side door.
The moment she felt Tina’s presence leave, a thick blanket of darkness descended onto Bette, so penetrating in its depth, that those close to her, even though they too had been devastated, feared that she wouldn’t be able to find a path out of the blackness she floated in for months after the accident.
That’s why it had been such a surprise when five months later Bette walked into the Planet and immediately caught everyone’s attention. The dark pallor that had hung on her was gone. There was a spring in her step. She even had her trademark smile beaming across her face. The gang was so taken with her appearance that the words filtering through her smile almost got lost. "I’m pregnant!"
Seeing their shocked faces, Bette carefully explained to them all that from the beginning of their relationship she and Tina had shared the same dream. They both had wanted children, not only to fulfill their own desires to be a mother, but to give that gift to the other. Tina had always said that she couldn’t wait to watch Bette with their child, couldn’t wait to see the wonderful mother she knew Bette would be.
And, even though many believed that Tina’s dream had died with her in the middle of the intersection of Wilshire and Fairfax, Bette felt the truth in every bone in her body...that she still had the ability to make both their dreams come true. It was because of this fierce belief that she made the decision to have their long awaited child, and within days of that decision was lying on a bed in Dr. Wilson’s office.
Now, here they were, gathered around their friend whose stomach showed every inch of her seven month pregnancy, crying for the woman who would never be able to see the radiant glow that now emanated from the soulful eyes of the one left behind.
"She would have been so happy to see you pregnant," Kit whispered.
"She would have loved watching the changes in your body," Alice winked at Bette, smiling.
"Knowing Tina, she would have loved the whole process of picking out the baby’s name," Shane said, her voice breaking.
"Yeah," Dana added. "And, she wouldn’t have picked out any of those stupid names that people in LA are always burdening their children with, like Apple or Moxie Crimefighter."
This caused them all to laugh through their tears. "Moxie Crimefighter? You telling me someone named their baby that?" Kit asked, bewildered.
"Yeah," Dana rolled her eyes. "I read it in some poll People magazine had...stupid."
The group of friends were silent for a minute, then Carmen leaned forward, gently placing her hand on Bette’s protruding belly, and whispered, "Do you think she knows?"
~ ~ ~
Tina smiled as she reached out to caress the soft white blossoms of jasmine growing all around her garden, breathing in its sweet scent. ‘Yes Carmen, I know,’ she continued to smile.
She loved working in her garden. A garden that was, for her, the perfect garden. She knew that this was heaven...and that heaven was whatever you dreamed it to be. And, for Tina, working in a garden filled with perfumed plants, including things like herbs, jasmine, eucalyptus, and lots and lots of wild flowers had always given her a sense of belonging. When she worked with the dirt to naturally help create such beautiful things, she knew she was truly a part of nature.
"I’ve known since the moment of conception," she said out loud, wishing that Bette could feel how happy she was about the baby...how excited she was for Bette, knowing that being a mother had always been one of Bette’s biggest dream. A dream she had not had the courage to share with anyone until the day her beautiful, loving, blonde soul mate walked into her life.
~ ~ ~
Bette laid her hand over Carmen’s, giving her a light squeeze.
"She knows...I can feel it throughout every part of me...she knows."
