Every minute of every weekend that I had with Angelica was precious. And I thoroughly enjoyed each second. But I must admit, taking care of a child, not yet one year old, could take its toll on me. I was always grateful when nap time came, and we both could get some rest.
This Saturday, I was particularly thankful to lay her down in the afternoon. Thinking about the previous night’s encounter with Helena was sapping my emotional energies. And it didn’t help that my sleep had been fitful. My mind had been in turmoil trying to understand where all those feelings had come from and what they meant, if anything.
At least Tina’s dropping Angelica off that morning proceeded without a distressing incident. That wasn’t always the case. We were still battling each other on adoption and custody arrangements, so I never knew what might come up. In the interim, I was joyously overwhelmed that she was allowing me every other weekend with our baby girl. And it was becoming a relief that every time I saw Tina, I realized my heart was mending just a little more. But, make no mistake, I certainly still had my challenging days and my despondent moments.
As I lay Angelica in her crib, covered her with her quilted baby blanket, and kissed her fat little cheeks, I lightly sighed admiring her beauty. After checking the monitor, I retired to my room, stretched out on my back on the bed and closed my eyes. I thought I might find a few moments to meditate and to find some peace.
The attempt, however, proved futile. Almost as soon as I closed my eyes, I envisioned Helena in my arms. I smelled her perfume just like she was there with me in my bedroom at that moment. I breathed in, deeply, welcoming her scent. It evoked the memory of feeling her tongue licking against my ear and my neck. I remembered how my body instinctively drew her closer as she rubbed my back and my bottom. My ass. Helena’s hand had been briefly on my ass. And I relished the sensation of it, wishing I could feel the flesh of her palm on my bare behind. How nice it was to feel desired again.
When her breasts peaked against mine and we moved against each other, it kindled a desire so deep within me, that heat emanated between my legs. I longed to kiss her, to hear her moan with the pleasure of my tongue rolling against hers. That dance was on a loop in my mind, and would not stop playing.
Now, here alone, just thinking about her was making me aroused, and wet, and in need of release. I imagined her with me and unbuttoned my blouse, placing my right hand over my breasts, massaging each of them and pinching my nipples. Feeling myself begin to throb harder, I lowered my hand under the elastic waistband of my lounge pants. I stroked myself back and forth with the moisture that picturing Helena had produced. For all intents and purposes she was the partner procuring my pleasure. And when I climaxed, I rolled over onto my side and fell into a welcome sleep with the hum of the baby monitor at my bedside.
An hour later I woke up feeling relaxed and refreshed. Allowing myself only an instant to luxuriate in the comfort of my bed, I roused myself to check on Angelica.
I gently pushed the door to her room open for a peek. She was still sleeping soundly.
Just then, I heard my cell phone ringing and went to pick it up off the kitchen counter.
Glancing at the Caller ID, I noticed an unfamiliar number.
“Hello? Bette Porter.” No one replied. Again I said, “Hello?”
“Bette. It’s Helena.”
My heart performed a gentle flip. Oh, god, was I ready for this?
“Helena.” My voice faltered. “How are you?” I nervously began wiping the countertop.
“That’s what I was calling to find out about yourself. As for me, at the moment, I’m feeling extremely ill at ease and self-conscious.”
Smiling, I slightly laughed as said, “That doesn’t sound like the Helena Peabody I know.”
I could detect a note of amusement when she finally replied, “No, it doesn’t, does it?”
“That’s okay. I’m feeling a bit the same way,” I answered.
“Is it alright that I called you? Are you busy?” she hesitated before continuing. “I mean, I’m aware you said last night you’d call me, but you did give me your number. I suppose I’m feeling a bit zealous in my endeavor to assimilate the ramifications of last night’s interaction.”
I laughed again. Her enthusiasm was endearing to me. “Helena, slow down. It’s quite alright that you called,” I reassured her. “I’m anxious to understand last night as well. If it makes you feel any better, I hardly slept at all last night thinking about it. How about you?”
“Well, since you’re being so honest, I’ll confess to you, no, not a wink,” she answered.
“I’m sorry to hear that, but not too surprised either. I did just get up from a nice nap though,” I offered, suddenly recalling but not daring to speak of how I’d tranquilized myself earlier that afternoon. “And Angelica is still sleeping. So you called at a perfect time.”
“How is your Angelica?” Helena asked.
“Beautiful and full of energy. Thank you for asking. She’s wanting to walk. So she’s doing the cutest thing. She turns her back to me, grabs both of my hands, pulls up, and coaxes me until I give in and stand. Then she walks me all over the house, non-stop. She can‘t get enough of it.”
“That’s adorable, Bette. I can tell you are a mother in love with your child.”
“I most definitely am,” I agreed, becoming more comfortable with the conversation. I walked into the living room and sat down on the sofa, propping my feet up. Using my free hand, I picked up Angelica’s plush stuffed kitten toy and ran my thumb over its whiskered cheek. “And how are your children, Helena?”
“I miss them, Bette. I haven’t seen them for three weeks. Except utilizing the webcam. And that’s an inadequate substitute for having them in my arms.” She sighed, and I felt badly for her.
“That must be very difficult for you,” I empathized.
“It is. But on the bright side, we are planning an extended visit next month,” Helena said enthusiastically.
“Oh, well, I’m sure you’re excited about that then.
