Loving forward to the future -- CHAPTER ONE

Bette's POV

After the fight we had the most loving day together that I can ever remember. I went out for the papers --both the trash and quality ones and we had breakfast in bed. A few hours of just reading and drinking coffee really relaxed both of us. We went to the beach in the afternoon and swam and talked. The evening became magical and mystical -- candles and wine by the pool - we talked some more and when the words were spent we lead each other by the hand and made sweet and prolonged love long into the night.

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MONDAY MORNING.

I think the best thing about forgetting to change an alarm clock is when it goes off and you can just switch it off and fall asleep again. Tina's alarm went off at 7am and she threw it across the room and snuggled against me.

" We get to sleep in for the rest of the week " she muttered.

"We should send your boss a box of fruit or candy to thank him for giving you a week off "

I reply slipping my hand onto her soft breasts and squeezing the one that's furthest away.

"I'm his favourite executive " she sleepily replies.

"Nothing to do with your sensational body " I retort moving closer and placing a soft kiss on her breast.

"He loves me for my brain "

"So do I "

"Bette Porter speaks with fork tongue "

"You've never complained about my tongue being forked before "

"Will you let me go to sleep please -- we didn't stop making out until 3:30 and I am very tired "

"So if I slip my hand down your body " I follow my words with the actions "and stroke your thigh - your inner thigh -- you wouldn't want to fool around ?"

"No - I want to sleep "

"So moving my fingers here " I softly move up the inside of her thigh and touch the hairs I find when I reach my summit "Is a pretty pointless exercise right ? "

She moans softly " Please let me sleep babe "

"You don't have to do a thing - you can let me do everything "

Finally Tina opens her eyes and removes my hand from its favourite journey - she places my hand on my stomach.

"I have never been able to just lie still and let you make love to me. Honey I love you with every part of me - I really need just a couple of hours sleep and then you are in for a wake up call like I used to give you in the ancient days of when we started . I don't say this very often -- but please let me just sleep -- very soon I'll be ready "

I know that she's right - but I feel like a kid at the start of their long summer holidays . I just want to get into my favourite hobbies -- which when I was 11 was going to the library, riding my bike and playing the guitar . Now I'm 41 I want to make love to Tina, spend time with Tina and lie by the pool watching Tina.

With reluctance I pull her close and nuzzle against her neck .

"Go to sleep babe "

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We cuddle close and soon fall into a deep sleep -- which is violently and rudely awoken by a set of deafening sounds. It sounds like a construction site for a large office block has started out in our kitchen. I leap out of bed and storm to the front door wrapping my dressing gown around me . Outside there is a site of sheer chaos in our normal quiet middle class, dull street - a black guy in tight shorts is drilling up the drive of the Hunt's old place, two guys are manning a cement mixer which by the sounds its making could be so old it could have been used to build the Washington Monument and a mobile generator is being cranked into life by BLOODY CANDACE . I glare at her until she looks across the street at me.

"Hello babe -- you wanna make me breakfast ? Something nice and HOT " she shouts across at me . Even from the distance we are at I can see her black eye . I am about to storm across to her but I'm pulled round by Tina - I spin to see her in a baggy tee shirt.

"Hey gorgeous " she kisses me so hard that I swear my tonsils rattle. When we ease away I look across to see Candace growling across - Tina pulls me inside and slams the door.

"She is trying to get a reaction from you "

"I know - is she going to try and screw up the rest of the week?"

"She can't mess this week up for us Bette -- come on - we'll make some breakfast and have some quality time together "

Soon we are sitting outside with coffee and fruit and toast on the table between us on the loungers .

"Can I ask you a couple of questions babe ?" Tina says softly.

"You know that you can ask me anything "

"Why -- why her ? I know this makes me sound a snob and terrible but she's so not your type Bette "

I look across at her -- she looks anxious. I know that this is a question that she has wanted to ask me for a long time. I think about how to reply - the only answer that I can give her is the straight one.

"She was so not you. You and I both know that I get hit on a lot and you also know that I've never had any trouble fighting them off. She was the diametrically opposite to you . I didn't want any woman who reminded me of you - no blonde with pale skin -- she had to be nothing that reminded me of the woman that I was letting down. If she'd been like you I would never have done it - I couldn't have done it . I wanted escapism - and that couldn't be any woman who made me think about you -- or our son"

"This is a question that you really don't have to answer -- did you ever name him ? When you bought the necklace - you must have been thinking about him -- when I think about him now - not when I was carrying him -- I call him Jack"

I take hold of her hand and bring it to my lips -- I have never shared this with anyone -- I've never even said his name out loud --- I don't know if I can.

" I kind of call him Christopher John " I say with a voice that I know is breaking " but we would have nicknamed him CJ . Christopher is the nearest to Christina and John"

"Is my dad and my grandfather's name " Tina says " Oh babe --I just don't know what to say - thank you "

"I only have Kit -- you've got a huge family -- maybe one day they will accept both of us and our child. Calling him John might have built a bridge or two "

"You really are the most amazing person Bette - thank you "

"I was never amazing until I met one Tina Kennard "

"I was heading towards a life of death by domestic boredom until I met you -- you changed my life Bette "

"And I was heading towards a lonely descent into desperation -- a different woman every week - I really cannot imagine how awful my life would have been if you hadn't been there Tina "

"You'd have found someone Bette "

"What -- only by the maths of large numbers ? - I'd have ended up with some nasty infection and probably a drink problem. I have no illusions what my life would have been like without you T - and to be honest I don't even want to speculate - you saved me Tina "

"We saved each other - I found with you a peace I never had with anyone else. Even now knowing you're in a room makes me less anxious"

We both fall silent - I'm thinking about the pre Tina person I was - and I like her less than the Bette who cheated on Tina. I cannot screw this up - neither of us would cope if we split up again - a third chance is never going to happen. Which is why I'm determined to make her happy and make sure nothing and especially no one gets in the way of our relationship.

"What are you planning to do today then ? " I ask as I glance at my watch -- I'm going to have to get a move on in the next 30 minutes.

"I want to do some shopping - maybe we could meet for lunch ? "

"That would be great - I'm free all afternoon -"

"What are your classes this morning ? "

"The first one is part of a diploma - I'm talking about the Pre Raphaelite Brotherhood at the moment- it's a bit dry to be honest . Their original teacher eloped with one of the students -- he lives in New Mexico with her now. The class get postcards from them once a month. " Tina laughs and touches my hand as she hands me a few segments of the orange she's just finished peeling.

"And the second class ?"

"Ah that's much more fun - they are all mature students and its called " "Art for the Terrified " - it's a basic course touching all the bases -- we have some great conversations - I basically go anywhere they want me to --- today its Mondrain. Its such a kick having to think on my feet so fast "

Tina smiles at me "You have such a kick in your step when you've been teaching -- did you know that ? "

"I do know that actually - its such a rush - I really think I'm going to be a good teacher "

"You already are "

I sigh " As much fun as this is I better go and get ready - if we're meeting for lunch do you want to pick me up from college and we can decide what to do there ? - we'll just take your car "

"That's fine -- what time to you have to be out of the house for ?""

"I like to be at college by 9:30 so we need to set off by 9 if that's okay by you honey ?"

"Of course - I'll be five minutes in the shower "

"Want anyone to scrub your back ? " she raises her eyebrows.

"And still be out of the house by 9 ? Get thee behind me Satan "

"I'll save the getting behind thee until later then " she laughs in her most dirty way. I can see this week becoming a shag festival.

I go and have a shower and I'm standing looking into wardrobe when Tina strolls in and strips naked . She knows I'm watching her from the mirror in the door - god she really pure physical perfection.

"Are you trying to distract me ?" I accuse her with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes " she comes up behind me and nibbles my shoulder " How am I doing ?" she slips her arms round my waist and cups my breasts.

"You know if you keep your hands where they are for the next 30 seconds I will have no option but to make love to you and then you'll have to return the pleasure and I'll be late for class " .

I'm not against the idea and she knows that . Slowly she kisses my neck

"You'll save Porter " she lets go of me and with a wink at the mirror she goes into the bathroom.

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Its just a few minutes after 9 when we finally leave the house. I immediately look across the road to see where Candace is - she's talking to the black guy who was digging up the drive at some ungodly hour this morning. Fortunately she doesn't see either of us though she must be made of steel not to feel the look of 100% loathing that Tina gives her .

"Take it easy T " I say softly.

"I haven't said a word " she protests as she gets into the car.

"You don't have to -- you could start world war three with your Tina special look of hatred - she means nothing to me "

As I'm clicking my seat belt into place she starts the car and reverses worryingly close to Candace before speeding down the street. For a few minutes she doesn't speak - just drives as fast as she can without picking up a ticket. Finally she relaxes her grip on the steering wheel and slows down to a respectable speed .

"Feel better for that T ?" I ask

"I do actually -- sorry "

"Don't mind me - you are an excellent driver - you know you are one of the probably three people who I don't mind being driven by. Everyone else just annoys the hell out of me "

"And the only person you let drive the Saab " Tina chuckles " despite the $1000 worth of damage I did to it three days after you bought it "

"It was $2300 actually and yes you are the only person on the planet who I wouldn't kill if they harmed my pride and joy. Mainly because you are the most precious thing in my life Tina "

I squeeze her thigh -- she slows the car down to stop at a set of lights - softly we kiss - her tongue demanding access - the kiss gets more passionate. The hooting of car horns behind us ends the kiss and Tina starts the car again.

"What do you want to do this afternoon ? " I ask still feeling her kiss on my lips .

"Anything that involves the two of us is just perfect in my book "

"Well think about it and we can talk about it over lunch"

We chat all the way to college - Tina pulls the car up and we kiss softly " I love you so much Tina " I say stroking her face.

"I love you, more than I've shown you lately but I will make it up to you I promise babe "

We share another hot kiss before I reluctantly get out of the car and taking my bag head into college.

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I arrive at my noon class a few minutes late .