‘What are we doing?’ Tina thought to herself. ‘Are we dating? Is that what this is when we go out now and then, flirt with each other shamelessly and then she drops me off at my apartment frustrated as hell?’

Tina took off her sandals and threw them into the closet by the front door. Her eyes caught a glimpse of the arrangement of Gerber daisies Bette had brought that night when she came to pick her up for dinner. She paused, and leaned in to take in their aroma. Bette had handed her the flowers upon her arrival. Once Tina took them from her, Bette then ran the backs of her fingers across Tina’s cheek before saying they had to get going or they would be late for their reservation.

Tina paused with her hand on her cheek, where only hours before Bette’s hand had been.

‘Why is she being so Goddamn polite all of a sudden? It’s not like she asked my permission to kiss me in her office, setting this whole crazy train in motion…But fuck, what a kiss that was.’

Tina’s mind wandered back to that day. She closed her eyes as if to recreate the moment. ‘At least I know it wasn’t just a phase, because my desire for her is not weakening with time, it’s getting even stronger…’ she thought to herself.

‘I didn’t even know I wanted her to do that until I sensed that she was going to move toward me. Well, maybe I knew. But there’s obviously going to be a certain amount of confusion when you’ve been with men all your life and all of a sudden you find yourself attracted to a woman…maybe it wasn’t confusion. Maybe it was denial.’

She pondered this possibility for a moment. Had she always been attracted to women, but only now, with Bette, she was no longer able to fool herself?

‘In any case, she hasn’t even tried to kiss me since that day. I’m not even seeing Eric anymore, she knows that, I don’t know what is holding her back. Maybe it’s a bit of a game with her. Even she seems to imply that she’s not one to be in a relationship, maybe she’s just passing the time with me until someone better comes along.’